I wasn’t sure what to do after my ‘run in’ and subsequent disagreement with my husband. I was very up in arms yesterday morning and rather emo.
I decided to leave for work early and listen to my music repetitively while driving in my car. Whether that’s an OCD compulsion or Autism stim, I don’t know, I just felt it would help and wanted to do it.
And did it help?
Yes, yes it did.
Did I have an epiphany? You might say that. It had a lot to do with my choice in music, which was a bit of Jeremy Camp.
If you haven’t heard of him, he’s a Christian artist. I’ll admit to liking very little Christian music at all, unless something speaks to me…and some of his stuff does.
Anywho, I got to thinking about how I should handle the situation. I was listening to Anxious Heart.
I was thinking how would Jesus handle the situation, because that has been my go to in difficult situations. In my mind, the perfect example of living right is Jesus, to put it in perspective. My answer is, He would respond with love. Not defensiveness and hurt and avoidance.
What did I do? I sent hubby a text…
“I’m sorry you’re overwhelmed. Let me know if there’s anything I can take off your plate.”
And I linked him Anxious Heart.
Despite the hurt and bad feelings he caused, I needed him to know that ultimately I love him and that I am here for him. So is God.
I needed to put myself aside, my ego. If I want to be more like Jesus, then I needed to love more and think of myself less.
I steeled myself for, not getting the response that would…not hurt. Hubby responded by saying he would try to ask for help more. I had said my piece with no expectations and not expected that, but it was nice.
It’s a good thing we resolved our issues because I ended up having a horrible day at work and needed to lean on him. Well, I ended up going home in tears and he decided to be there for me when he had other plans. I’ll have to tell ya’ll about it, if I can handle rehashing the drama again.
I need a breather. Pray today will be a better day!