Blog Ketamine And God? 12 Nov 2022November 12, 2022 I have made an offhand mention in another post that I do ketamine treatments for my mental health. I have yet to expound upon that or discuss my experience with…
Blog God IS Good. My Traumas, Testimony, Plus A Challenge. 8 Nov 2022November 8, 2022 I don’t talk about my faith enough, considering how steeped in it I am in real life. I often feel bad about myself for it, like I’m letting the ball…
Blog Emotional PTSD, Estimated Recovery Time? 27 Feb 2022 Many months back I ended up yelling at my husband that he in fact broke me and that’s why I am so messed up. Harsh words, to put that on…
Blog Religious and Childhood Traumas, and the Aftermath 28 May 2021June 7, 2021 In a previous post a couple months back, I stated that all the hate belongs to me. Just a week ago I was feeling that intensity again, to the point…
Blog… Recipe for Scrupulosity/Religious OCD. 14 Apr 2021April 4, 2022 I have been spending a lot time contemplating my "backstory". My theory is, if I figure out the why, I can therefore figure out a solution and fix what was…
Blog… Stopping the Downward Spiral. 12 Apr 2021April 4, 2022 Anxiety kept me from church Sunday, and now I’m going down the rabbit hole of depression and even more anxiety. It feels shallow to admit it stems from not receiving…
Blog Reflection: Hiding my Scars 10 Apr 2021 It's been 2 days. It feels like years. That I sent an email to my Pastor and I'm awaiting a response. I normally have the patience of a Saint, truly.…
Blog OCD, Shame, Fear, Hate, Traumatic Childhood…Oh My? 9 Apr 2021 I find myself upset, or "moody" currently and getting depressed. So rather than anxiety triggering a compulsion...it's my depression. Which for some reason, doesn't really feel right or make sense.…
Blog… Control the Panic, ERP 5 Apr 2021May 28, 2021 I did my first try at the exposure therapy (ERP) today and drove to my church and parked outside. My anxiety was through the roof and my chest hurt pretty…
Blog… Easter Didn’t Kill Me, but it Might as Well Have 5 Apr 2021May 28, 2021 Easter is hard for me. I feel guilty for ever feeling bad when people talk about Christ’s suffering. Maybe guilt isn’t the word, it just feels so much more than…
Blog… Huge Progress 31 Mar 2021April 1, 2021 I went through a lot today and it was hard, but things are looking up because I have support and hope. I talked to my psychiatrist about the religious OCD…
Blog… The Assault Victim’s Fault, a Pastor’s Opinion 31 Mar 2021April 4, 2022 Years back I nearly got up and walked out of a church in the middle of a service. I was a visitor to an employee’s church and the Preacher had…
The Obsessively Anxious 