Mental Malfunction – When The Brain Doesn’t Work As Intended

Do you ever walk into a room to grab something and then forget what you came in to grab? Misplace your keys, though you put them in the same place every time? Sure you have, because everyone has forgotten something or misplaced an item they normally keep track of carefully.

But imagine it going overboard. Way overboard. The past month plus I’ve seen this.

Needing to run to the store to return something, leaving without it, and having to go back to get it. Driving home from work to pick something up I forgot, but then when I return, I realized I did something else completely and forgot what I needed in the first place.

A couple weeks ago, I thought I left my work phone at the shop. After church, I took the time to drive all the way out to my shop. Which is when I realize I didn’t have my keys. That’s not the “oh duh” moment. That comes when I’m searching desperately through my purse, hope I find a back-up key, and then I find my work phone instead.

Well, at least I didn’t need my keys to get into the shop?

*Shrug*

It’s easy enough to laugh off and not take too seriously. Yes, I get that stress can make such things happen more. And my fibromyalgia.

The problem comes when it interferes with work. Like trying to reschedule clients. I give them X date on X day, at a specific time. Well, those days and dates don’t match. And I do it repeatedly! I am 100% mortified and don’t know how to explain it away.

Is it exhaustion from lack of sleep from all my recent pain? Is it exhaustion from just being in pain all the time in general? Is it the ever famous “fibro fog”? Could be just stress and anxiety. Whatever the cause, I can’t think straight and it’s embarrassing me.

I need to rest my mind, but I can’t get sleep.

I’m praying that the week after next, I’ll be able to rest both my mind and body during my week off. I’m hoping with that rest, my mind will recover a bit. I don’t like feeling like I don’t make sense, I forget everything, and just can’t put thoughts together cohesively. I want my mind back… it’s just too much.

Just one more week… one more.

Holding on.

3 Comments

  1. I find that routine helps; I can always find my keys because they only ever live in one place. I also place objects so they’re in the way, so if I had to take something with me when leaving the house later, I’d put it so that it’s blocking the front door.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, I do agree routine helps tremendously. Things are usually always in the exact same spot, never fail. I’m finding lately that nothing is ending up where it’s supposed to and that’s especially frustrating.
      I’m going to try putting things in the way though, just on the counter to come with me isn’t working… that’s a great idea. Thank you!

      Liked by 1 person

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